Mother fucking AMAZON.COM is holding my Christmas presents for people HOSTAGE!!!!
I ordered a few days ago and they still haven't shipped. This means that they wont arrive for christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now i have to go to a mall. FUCKING MALL on CHRISTMAS EVE EVE!!!

Okay, tonight we had our holiday party for work. It went well. There were more people than I expected and more bonuses handed out than necessary with invariably lowered my bonus. Thank you, part-timers.

I think snowboarding would be fun to try. I hate skiing. Gravity kicks in too much. God this reminded me I have some work to do before bed. WHAT THE HELL.

I ordered nachos, fried pickles, burger, fries and 3 beers tonight. I could have had several more beers and some desert but I decided to be magnanimous. That is also my new favorite word. Too bad i can't pronounce it.

When I was in elementary school, i had to go to speech once a week. To this day, I am not sure why. I could talk just fine but they insisted I couldn't say "S" and "R" well enough. Also, they were concerned since I was 80% deaf in my right ear. Oh well, not like that's a problem. Of course, it is hard to explain to people that whispering into my right ear is a hopeless endeavor. Why is it hopeless, do you ask? Because I am fucking deaf in it! Were you not paying attention you ADHD prick?

I need to calm down. I am pissed about my bonus. It is right between butt-fucked and jelly of the month club.